Taking an example, i love my wife or brother the most. They keep making mistakes and basic carelessness and i loose my patience on the same and vent out my anger on them. Usually its a combination of not speaking to them or shouting on them.
Is there any other way.
Tags: Anger, Arises, Care, Control, love, Most, People, Should, That
If you explain to the people who mean a lot to you why you get angry, then that helps a lot. If they understand that it’s just because you love and care about them, then they can help.
Venting is good, you just have to figure out the best and most effective way to do it that works for you and the people around you. The better those around you understand the easier it makes everything.
Try letting people know straight forward when something they do upsets you, and why.
Giving people the silent treatment can leave them feeling neglected or confused. And shouting at them makes them feel like you don’t have enough respect to talk to them with respect.
Sorry for the blab, but I hope it helps(:
Anger usually comes from disappointment and love for the people you care for the most. Remember the following;
1. If you know that you are on the verge of a temper flare up taste your words. This means think about what you may say to the person you are angry at and how what you say may affect them.If it is not going to benefit the hearer then don’t say it.
2. Not speaking to people can lead to bitterness and regrets. If you are yelling stop yourself mid-sentence, and take 10 or more deep breaths with your back turned to the person you are upset with. This exercise gives you an opportunity to control your anger properly.
3. WALK AWAY!!!! If you know that the situation could end up bitter by something you may say REMOVE YOURSELF FROM THE SITUATION!! People prefer to talk about situations rather than yelling over someone. When you yell nobodies point gets across!
4. IS IT WORTH IT?? Ask yourself if it is worth putting your two sense into, or if it is so BIG of a situation to be mad about if it’s not shut up, or stay quiet.
Real love does not seek to bind, control, or enslave; but to liberate to empower, to set others free to find their own truth.
Anger is the language of fear not love. If you want to show your loved ones how much you care, surrender the anger and embrace forgiveness and tolerance. If someone makes a mistake, show them compassion and tenderness, not angry words or upset emotions. Become a teacher, most humble, most loving and empower those around you with your gentle patience and understanding. Teach the language of love and acceptance.
Good Luck & Stay connected to Love!
Our anger doesn’t accomplish the things we hope it will.
While it may be tiresome I can only encourage you to keep patiently repeating whatever it is you need to tell your wife/brother in order to eliminate their “carelessness”. Knowing that there are things that YOU do in this life that someone, somewhere finds “careless” and they spare you their wrath.
There are MANY “other ways” to express yourself. But, before you do anything, you need to fix what makes you think ANYONE deserves to be emotionally abused by you. Anger comes from selfishness. You get angry because you are not getting what you want. You then PUNISH by withholding communication and or yelling. YOU ARE EMOTIONALLY ABUSING THEM - this is NOT love - this is CONTROL.
There are many very good anger management classes everywhere. Call around, look in the phone book, ask around. You have already taken the hardest step by admitting that you may have a problem and need help. Right on. Good Luck.
Patience. Although, your anger is a strong expression of love, and you cannot deny your innermost feelings. But if you want alternatives, just use patience, since it’s one of the most exercised practices that help people get through tough times with each other.
To be angry at people means that one considers their acts to be important. It also means that one considers their personal thoughts and actions to be more important than anyone elses.
If you really care and love them , let them learn from their mistakes. Do not be like a teacher. Let them handle their own things unless they themselves come to you with any problems.